Mmm, tastes like chicken

Opposable thumbs are one of the most underrated things in our daily lives, something that has been brought home to me over the past 24 hours. It’s amazing what you can’t do when one thumb is out of action: pulling up tights; washing your hair easily; opening a pack of polos; doing up a pair of trousers; typing properly. Even doing up my bra this morning turned into more of a palaver than I had counted on.

How did I injure said digit? For reasons best known to myself, I decided that what my Spaghetti Bolognese really needed last night was “Hint of Cas” in the shape of a chunk of my left thumb. Instead of onion, I chopped me. Not pleasant, for me, or for Moose who was very speedy with the band-aids. (Thank you Moose 🙂 )

Now, what I should of done, when curious as to the taste of human flesh, was take myself off to HufuTM is the Healthy Human Flesh Alternative. The tofu based product was created for those anthropology students curious about cannibalism, but who weren’t too keen on chowing down on their dorm-mates after lights out. However, and I quote:

We also found that HufuTM is a great product for cannibals who want to quit. HufuTM is also a great cannibal convenience food — no more Friday night hunting raids!

Now, if I was a cannibal, I think I’d find those hunting raids part of the fun. Free range always tastes so much better than battery-farmed, don’t you think? Then again, you might fancy a burger but not fancy going out and roping a steer before you can have supper. I’m all for equal opportunities. Why shouldn’t cannibals have fast-food as well?

I am indebted to the “Head Temp” for finding out about HufuTM for me. It says something for how odd I really am: I’ve not been in the job a month and she stumbles across fake human flesh and the first thing she thinks is “Hmmmm, Cas would love that!” Anyway, I would like to proclaim her as the latest Blog Minion.

That’s not to say I give the impression I would like fake human flesh. Rather, I obviously give the impression that the weird and the bizarre on the ‘Net float my boat.

Everybody say hello to “the Head Temp” and make her welcome around Bright Meadow 🙂

(The “Head Temp” is only a temporary blog-name for this individual. I’m currently all uninspired, and I do like to give people the option of choosing their own blog-names if at all possible. One notable exception being the Cute Canadian. Well, it would have given the game away a lot sooner if he’d chosen the name under which he was being blogged about, wouldn’t it? Much less fun 😉 )

10 thoughts on “Mmm, tastes like chicken

  1. I was in stitches reading this… Had to pause before typing this comment as I didn’t have the oxygen I needed as ribs had gotten sore. Anyway… I think I will have to try this ‘Hufu’! Very intriguing.
    Hope your finger gets better…
    Just one last thing… *SIGH* Another Blog Minion!!!? By the time I get / if I get the rank it won’t be common and then I won’t feel as special 🙁 lol
    I would comment more, but having issues over at my blog… my comment text area box has randomly decided to disobey my css file and get wider than the size available. Try many tings… then gave up and now uploading a new k2 to work off. But it will need to be customised slightly again before use, so will see you during my next daily visit… altho I have to admit, it can sometimes be hourly. I get bored easily…

  2. I’m glad someone found this funny! I was starting to worry that maybe talking about human flesh (even the alternatives) was crossing some line…

    Moose did raise a valid point whilst we were waiting for the bus this evening: how do they know it tastes like human flesh? Not sure I want to know the answer to that one really 😕

    All my Blog Minions are special to me, and they always will be, regardless of how many I have/potentially will have. But relax. No promises, but who knows? One of these days I might just arbitrarily make some Blog Minions. I’m feeling a mite unpredictable right now. (Cups of tea, saying nice things about me, and sending in bits for the Sunday Roast are still the best ways to gain your Minionhood though 😉 )

    (and if this comment appears twice, then apologies. CoCo thinks it has gone through, WP thinks it has gone through, but will it show on the post? Will it hell!)

    (edit 2: ok, sorted. No idea what was going on there. It’s late – poor Bright Meadow needs its beauty sleep, just like me).

  3. I liked it so much… I did a little post on Hufu myself, I did mention that I read it from you. I hope you don’t mind. Can be found here, but it was just so funny.

    P.S I too was wondering how they know it tastes like, as they state, ‘taste and texture of human flesh’! But oh well, I live in Northern Ireland and they are a long way from me.

  4. Yo Ho! ’tis I: she that is the “Head Temp”. I guess most people know me by illy online, so illyna it shall be if that’s ok with you.

    I’ve never been anyone’s minion at all, let alone for a blog, so if there are any blog-ley (bloggish?) rituals that I need to perform, you’d better let me know. Unless its making more cups of tea, which I can probably cope with.

    Sorry it has taken me so long to respond, I’ve written something several times but it never seems to be up to standard. That and I can’t make the quicktags work so I’ve gone for a vanilla post until I have better taught myself.

    Thanks for having me, and Hi all… Off to poke around!

    And as for HuFu, there was a perfectly innocent explanation, but if you prefer to believe I am a cannibal, that is fine with me 😉

  5. Well hello there illyna 🙂
    No, no special rituals or duties (though a helping hand when it comes to put in action my plans for world domination is kind of expected). Though now I think about it, cups of tea sounds like a very good idea. Hmmm, wonder if I can make the entire office Minions, that way I’ll never have to make another cup again…

    And hmmm, quicktags are working for me. What browser were you using? Anyone else having this problem? I know that the blog looks butt-ugly on IE, so it might be another IE problem.

  6. Lots of people still use IE. Even I have to use it on a day to day basis, hence finding out that things look ugly using it.

  7. I use Firefox, and I am hurt by the fact that you even considered that I might use IE!

    I think the quicktags problem was more to do with user error rather than anything on your end.

    I will try once again:

    The Ultimate Showdown

    For your viewing pleasure!

  8. Now that is sheer genius! I haven’t laughed so much since… well, since you shared the HuFu link actually 😀
    Speaking of which, you really need to share that “innocent” explanation of how you came across it.

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