Sunday Roast: Mark Webber’s got a fat arse

So. Yes. I haven’t Roasted in a few weeks. I could spew out excuses, but I won’t. Quite simply I couldn’t be arsed last week. But this week I am back blogging with the best of them, if only because Moose is making snickerdoodles and I think she would withhold them if I didn’t post. Yes, she is my blogging coach. You would be surprised what you can get me to do by promising/withholding baking/sweet/chocolate-goodness.

How has this week gone? I’m not rightly sure. It’s been a struggle because I’ve been feeling a bit pants again (damn winter and cold season!) and work has lost it’s hectic edge because we’ve just finished quarter end. This is good because it’s nice to have a breather. This is bad because when my body knows it can take it a bit easier, it just breaks down, like it’s been storing up all the bugs and stress for when it’s a convenient time to have them. How are things on the EDLO front? Frustrating as ever. The Boss Lady is putting all sorts of ideas in my head – bad Boss Lady, bad! I’ve a graphic enough imagination already, without you egging me on to disaster thank you very much! Other than that, things have been pootling on as usual.

So I shall pootle away and bring you the Roast for this week. Some things might be a little out of date because this collection spans the past couple of weeks of my laziness…

I never could get into listening to podcasts or watching videoblogs regularly. They just took up too much time and forced me to focus my (admittedly scatty) attention on just that one thing for the length of time the media lasted. Not great. So I could listen/watch on the daily commute on my iPod, but that would require regular/daily synching of my aged iPod, something I don’t like to do as my aging PowerBook is starting to get grumpy at running iTunes. Anyway, my point is, I’m not alone (he’s even got an interesting segue into online advertising at the end of the piece).

I don’t care about reading the book, I just love how the NYT turns a book about how what would happen if humans didn’t exist turns it into a book about what would happen if New Yorkers didn’t exist. Bless their egocentric little cotton socks.

God I’m such a geek – I even find network theory fascinating.

You’ve got to love the Catholics – when they want to make themselves look silly, they really go for it.

The geeks are working on universal avatars. That’s quite a thought, just one online version of “Cas” in any environment…

OK, I know I said at the top of the post I couldn’t get into podcasts – the launch of The Archers podcast might just persuade me. I love The Archers and used to listen religiously to the omnibus on Sundays at uni, lying in bed with my morning cup of tea, recovering from the wild debauchery of the night before. I stopped listening in a few years back because I just can’t get a good radio signal here at Meadow Towers… I might have to start up again. Bring on the wild debauchery as well 😉

Jeremy Kyle is hosting a radio show at the same time as Jonathan Ross. I’m sorry, but if you listen to Jonathan Ross already you’re NOT going to switch to Jeremy Kyle. The two audiences are about as diametrically opposed as the Sharks and the Jets!

Rarely do op-ed pieces make me laugh out loud. This one on gender tyranny in M&S did. No sex in corduroy indeed.

It’s been a few years since I’ve been down the Chesterfield Canal and I certainly don’t remember it looking this pretty.

Joe has found his cure for blogging ennuie – turn off the stats. I’m feeling a bit smug right now, because I stopped looking at my stats eons ago 😉 I keep a vague eye on my rss subscribers, but that’s only a general guide. I know if the number drops TOO drastically I’ve been prevaricating far too long and need to actually write something. But Joe’s got the right end of the stick I think – you need to enjoy what you’re doing or there’s no point. And I actually got to say that a few times this week, for different reasons. People kept looking at me like I had the cure for cancer or something…

OK people, I’m going to let you in on a little DIY secret I’ve learnt from a lifetime of observing the Crazy Canalman build things – you don’t need fancy gadgets to help you hammer in a nail. Just use a scrap of paper. Push the nail through the paper, line up the nail, hold the paper, hammer nail. Easy.

And you wonder why I want to go into space.

Sometimes you just need a good hug.

I was fighting the fact that, at 25, I should consider myself “grown up”. Then I read this post, got 17 out of 25, and realised that I might as well just give in any buy the carpet slippers and pipe now.

I don’t meditate with anything approaching regularity. When I do, it’s usually because my brain is going fifty-thousand revs a minute and I know I need to take a time out, or go totally fruit loops. Reading this list of the benefits however, makes me think it might be an idea to make it part of my routine again.

Alex Lee is going bookless for a year. All credit to him. I just can’t imagine being tied to an e-book reader for a whole year, though considering my current bad habit of raiding charity bookshops for any trashy romance novels I can lay my hands on (I know, I know), the chick-lit shelf of shame is starting to fill up already, so perhaps digital books might be a good idea?

In an attempt to regain some of my geek-credentials after that last revelation of my taste in bad literature, I am really rather excited that the Thundercats movie is getting going.

Looking at my movie collection, I’ve just realised that I am missing some of my favourite films of all times: the Terminator movies. I feel a trip to Amazon coming on… But that does bring me to news of a second Terminator trilogy.

The NYT movie reviews sometimes throw up a gem, such as this review of Elizabeth: the Golden Age (worth it if only for the description of Clive Owen hanging from the rigging with the wind gently stirring his chest hair…)

I got told off by Abi last weekend for not giving her any trailers to watch. So Abi, the following are all for you –
Moondance Alexander. What is it with pre-pubescent girls and horses, I will never know. But, despite my curmudgeonly self, I found myself grinning a little and saying “awww…” at this trailer. Shoot what’s left of my self respect, please!

Juno. Who knew teen pregnancy could be funny?

Fred Claus. I refuse to let Christmas cheer into Meadow Towers just yet, but… damn, Vince Vaughan does make me laugh!

And with that the Roast is done for another week. I am off to hoover the flat because it is in dire need, and then it’s time to watch Alonso and Hamilton try and run each other off the road in the Brazilian Grand Prix. Fun 😀

9 thoughts on “Sunday Roast: Mark Webber’s got a fat arse

  1. I would like to point out that not only has this week’s title been taken completely out of context, I’ve also been quite badly mis-quoted. 😳

    I don’t know what you’re problem is, I only got 15 out of 25 and I’m way older than you. Lighten up woman, live a little!

  2. Good one, Cas.

    I have to admit, I never saw how chocolate could be an essential ingredient for a roast, but there you go. You should’ve said. For us to get our roasts, you must have your chocolate. Deal. Where shall we drop off your weekly supplies?

    I loved the New York thing. I’m just a sucker for apocalyptic gloom.

    And you can never get enought Terminator. Never. That said, the very first one is still ingrained in my early teen memory. It’s a classic.

    Oh, and Kimi won. Lovely, who’d have thought?

  3. OK Moose, if you hadn’t said anything, no one (other than my dad) would know that you were in any way responsible for the title!

    And yes, I will admit I have gleefully misquoted Moose. We were talking about how hard it apparently is to fit into F1 cars and she brought up remembering that apparently Mark Webber had had a bit of trouble fitting into one of the earlier Williams’ as he is so tall and the car had been designed for smaller people. Hence, “Mark Webber must have had a fat arse, apparently”.

    There, what she really said.

    I do like the Terminator – I like Alien a bit more (I have the most vivid memories of watching it with my brother when I was probably far too young to be watching it) – but Terminator is still great 😀

    And yes, Kimi one. He’s the one I wanted too win. Anything but Alonso or Hamilton!

  4. I love it when you call New Yorkers’ Egocentric Little Cotton Socks by name, Cas. 😉 I also found the fight in the nunnery absolutely hilarious.

    But the 25 signs you’ve grown up? I’m absolutely appalled. I’ve met more than half of the criteria and there’s no way I have .. grown … up …… I don’t think so, at least. 🙁 *grumble grumble*

  5. You’ve misquoted me again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😡

    After a discussion about former F1 drivers still being able to fit into the cars I said, “Apparently, Mark Webber has a fat arse.”

    There, that was what I really said.

    Yea Kimi! Boo McLaren appealing and putting the title into doubt. Sore losers.

  6. And trust me ladies and gentelbeans – that scary face is nothing on the noise that issued from the other room when she found out I’d misquoted her. Again.

    Not that the real comment is that much nicer!

    Boo McLaren indeed.

  7. @Esther (eek, didn’t mean to miss you out!) – I think we’re all worrying too much about the list. It’s clearly not “25 signs you’ve grown up”, but “25 signs your a wonderful person” 😉

  8. Yay, roast.

    Not being of the UK, I thought that maybe M&S was a backward sort of S&M. Uh, not the case. I am of the purple corduroy bell-bottoms generation, though my mom enjoys telling the story of the time that I (at age 4) insisted on wearing both pants and a dress to church.

    Speaking of getting away from traditional book consumption, I’m thinking about joining Bookswim. It is the Netflix of books and I’m trying to avoid having a home library.

    I’m glad that you’re a fellow bargain-bin trashy romance reader. I didn’t read them until I started living in a retirement community, then they were in the community library all of the time. And free! Thus began an awful addiction to pretty much anything written by Nora Roberts.

    But for some reason, stuff like Jane Green’s ‘The Other Woman’ or Kinsella’s ‘Shopoholic’ series makes me want to vomit.

    In closing (because I didn’t want to end on the vomit note), I realize now why I depend on the movies here: I went to the Apple previews page and thought to myself ‘I can’t watch these! What if Cas features one next week? Then I will have already watched it.’

  9. M&S/S&M – easy mistake to make.

    Actually, not really. I now have this insanely disturbing image of little old ladies in… No, I can’t even bring myself to type the sentence. Thank you Abi. I shall be sure to send you the bill for the therapy.

    That bookswim seems like a great idea, though I’m not sure I could really conscience the money (if something similar started in the UK), seeing as how I live a three minute walk from the local library…

    And oooh, I just love that I have had such an impact on your browsing (at least of movie trailers). The power! The power!

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