So there was no Roast last week – well it was my birthday and every once in a while things more important than blogging will occur. I know, heresy, but it’s true. In recompense, this week you will have a bumper-sized Roast with offerings from the past two weeks. Aren’t you fortunate people?

A recent study has shown that wearing cycling helmets makes you more likely to crash (especially if you are a man). Like the article says, I wouldn’t take this as a reason not to wear a helmet, but I do love how drivers gave the researcher more room when he was wearing a long wig…

This is just plain cruel – Gloucester city council is giving gulls fake eggs in an attempt to confuse them and stop them breeding. The thought of a pair of gulls looking after this plastic egg, wondering why it isn’t hatching, is just so sad. What do they do with the real eggs? Because I’m assuming substitution has to be made at some point, in the manner of cuckoos. Mean.

As a recent fish-owner, I resent that a museum gave a fish a make over because it was too ugly. Not only that, they took out one of it’s eyes!

It’s been a while since I linked to ProBlogger. Time to remedy the situation. Darren wrote a piece about cliques and how easy it is to unintentionally exclude people which set a few alarm bells tinkling. I don’t have an excessively large readership here at Bright Meadow, but there is a core group of you who can be relied upon to pop up in the comments more often than not. As a reluctant commentor myself I know how intimidating it can seem the first time on a new blog, especially if there seems to be an extant community. I’m not sure how best to deal with the phenomenon, but I shall continue to be as welcoming as I can. No scaring off the newbies now!

Bewjeweled and Tetris on the iPod. Oh lordy, lordy, lor. You’d never get anything done!

I was going to be a good girl and download iTunes 7, but luckily I saw Tammie’s experiences before I hit the ‘download’ button. Eek! I don’t actually listen to music through the PocketCalculator, just turning iTunes on when I want to rip a new cd and upload it too the iPod, mainly because even iTunes 6 makes my (old) G4 with 512 mb memory (which was top spec when I brought it!) sit back and act like it’s digesting a big meal. I’m waiting for a fix, or at least for when I can get down and dirty and completely wipe my HD and start over. Of course the ideal solution would be a new computer (how the hell will I be able to resist when this opens?) but as I don’t have a few grand spare to waste, no iTunes 7 for Cas right now. If only I could get the automatic software update to shut up about it!

So simple, so subtle and ties into my own fascination with graffiti.

Again with the ugly pets getting makeovers.

I’m going to go see Imogen Heap in a few weeks time, so I’ll let you know how her decision to pick supporting acts through MySpace turns out.

Have you got your Moo cards yet? I’ve ordered my ten free (go being a pro user!) and I will let you know how they look when they arrive, but I’m really quite excited about them. I’ve been pondering the idea of business cards for when (if) I get my arse in gear and get to some conferences (CAA UK in Jan 2007 for sure) and these are just so much more… fun! And personal.

I would be remiss in my 9rules duties if I didn’t point out to y’all that the next submission round is October 25th. I’ll try not to get all recent-convert on you, but they are a great bunch of people. It might not be for you, but if you ever fancied hanging out with some scarily smart people and having a laugh in the process, try it. You might like it 😉

Sad news for motor and Top Gear fans every where this week when presenter Richard Hammond got seriously injured in a crash. His family have requested that instead of flowers/cards/etc people make donations to the Yorkshire Air Ambulance. To do so, just go to this page at JustGiving.com

And lastly, Are you?

I was told off in no uncertain terms just now for being late with the Sunday Roast. What can I say? Charmed just seemed good to me this afternoon 😉

Lelia asks that we amuse her. So go on, come up with some captions for those pictures…

The divine Nanette is doing amazing volunteer work with School on Wheels. It sounds like a brilliant idea to help homeless children get an education. If you are So.Cal based, think about it.

Job interviews suck. Yes, yes they do. From experience they are where the wheels tend to come off the wagon for me. I’ve managed to land an interview in a few weeks time (not an exciting job, but hey – it’s money!) because the person short listing for another job liked my application so much she thought I would be perfect for this other job. Not the job I applied for, but that’s hardly surprising considering I very cheekily applied for something I completely lack the experience for (if you don’t ask you don’t get). Anyway, I don’t hold out any hope of getting the job mainly because I interview badly. Old speech impediments kick in, as do nervous behaviours. I’m too honest. I’m too screwball! So yes, how do I get a job without interviewing for it, because if I have to interview I’m gonna be a temp for a looooooooong time!

Britain’s human history has been revealed. Please note however that just because there’s no evidence it does not mean people definitely weren’t around during those blank spots. As my Human Origins professor used to say constantly “Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence”. I do love the idea though of Britain being the edge of the universe 😀

And I thought I took ergonomics quite far… My brain just can’t work out how the hell this keyboard works! Sure looks fun however.

Dangermouse is back.

Here’s a handy tip you might not have been aware of (Mac users only I’m afraid) – Pressing Apple+Control+D over any word in a cocoa application pops up the dictionary/thesaurus. Handy.

The Wiki Wired experiment was a success. As opposed to the catastrophic LA Times Wikitorial that kicked off in the middle of my thesis. Not the best example of wiki use I’ve ever had to quote!

A Sudanese man has been forced to marry a goat.

And further goat-related madness, in what has to be the best excuse for speeding ever, a Swiss man caught speeding in Canada blames the lack of goats on the roads. They may not have goats, but they do have moose, and they’d make a hell of a lot more damage to your car if you hit one!

And to close with a picture this week, you should always let sleeping cats lie.

Excuses, excuses I know, but if this Roast is shorter and even more poorly typed than usual, forgive me. And blame RSI.

I’ll be talking more about this shortly when I am able to once again type at length, but for now I shall just notify you about the Pink for October event to raise awareness about Breast Cancer. I shall be participating, so will lots of others, and it would be amazing if y’all would get on board too.

This one’s for Moose because she’s been feeding me homemade cookies all weekend. Also, there’s no race this week so she needs her F1 fix – Formula One is considering hybrid engines.

There’s been a bit of buzz this week about chumbys (what is the plural of chumby? Can you get a herd of chumbys? I’m digressing…) Anyway, a chumby is a “compact device that can act like a clock radio, but is way more flexible and fun”. It uses wi-fi to connect to the internet, it’s designed to be hackable, adaptable and just plain cute. I can already see it sitting on my bedside table (in my mind). I want to play! But as I don’t stand a kitten in purgatory’s chance of getting one – by no stretch of the imagination am I either a the serious alpha-geek hacker, clever crafter or accomplished Flash animator you need to be to get a prototype – I guess I am going to have to wait and listen to what those lucky so-and-so’s who have one have to say.

I don’t care if this is true or not. McDonald’s have had to redesign their McFlurry containers in the UK so hedgehogs don’t get stuck.

I’ve been an organ donor a long time (since I was about 13 I think), give blood on a regular basis, and am signed onto the Bone Marrow Register. This last especially because I’ve seen first hand the good bone marrow transplants can do, and the agony families face when there isn’t a match within the close family. Not finding an in-family match can often be a death sentence unless a match can be found with an anonymous donor. Up till now, however, if I had died and the doctors wanted to use my organs to help others (I carry a card making my wishes known) but my family had said ‘no’, the doctors would have had to respect their wishes. The laws have now changed to respect donors wishes over those of the family.

It’s odd, the things that inspire you. These panorama planets that Phu discovered have set of a veritable mindstorm of story ideas. Excellent…

The U.N. debates Open-Source software.

A small bar/cafe near Meadow Towers does the most divine warm chinese duck salad. It is single handedly responsible for making me see that salad can actually be tasty. I’m not saying it’s the healthiest salad in the world, but it sure is tasty. (Short of seducing the chef at said bar/cafe for the recipe, this is the closest I’ve found so far to the holy grail).

Paul has a very thought provoking piece over at Many-to-Many on Social Publishing. It’s hard to summarize in one or two lines, but it is interesting.

And the closing funny. Fortune cookes – perhaps they know more than you think…

I’m in the midst of the most almighty spam flood at the moment – we’re talking tens of pieces a minute. I’m shutting comments off on the posts that seem to be attracting the most attention and watching my moderation and Akismet queues like a hawk. There’s not really much else I can do. I’m trying to make sure legitimate comments don’t get caught up, but if you post and your comment doesn’t appear, let me know (use the contact form) and I’ll see what I can do. Apologies also for anything unsavoury that slips through – Bright Meadow seems to be attracting some of the obscurer genres of porn-spam.

With that bit of business out of the way, on with the fun stuff of the Roast. I shall endeavor to make it far and away superior to last weeks lackluster offering 🙂

How would you classify a ‘blog’? This is a question I’m sure most of us have had a stab at answering at one time or another when we’re trying to explain to our parents or loved ones why we obsessively sit at the computer and write stuff for the edification of strangers. My answer is normally something along the lines of “It’s this website where I write about stuff that interests me. And stories I’ve written lately. I get comments from quite a few people. No, it doesn’t make me money but I am making lots of contacts! It will make some great opportunities… It will be good in the long run!” (I’m pretty much lying through my teeth by this point, but I know what appeases the Aged P’s). Basically I try not to even mention the word ‘blog’, because that gets me 1) having to say the word ‘blog’ out loud, 2) looks of blank confusion – I’m making up words now?, and 3) occasional “oh, like a MySpace right?” None of which is good for me.

You’d think however that the great and the good could come up with a better definition. Um, no. Scoble took a stab at it and got himself torn a new one. My own glee at Scoble getting trounced aside, I’d agree with most of what Stowe has to say. The ‘blog’ phenomena has too many variables to be so narrowly defined. When I’m browsing around things I don’t go “this is a blog because it has comments, this isn’t a blog because it doesn’t have RSS…” If I think on it at all I go “this site is primarily personal opinion on X topic, this site isn’t…” The former (to me) is a blog. The later a website. I’m more likely to come back to one that has RSS, or one that has comments, but it’s still a blog without them. By my definition of there needing to be a personal opinion behind it, splogs/mechanical blogs aren’t blogs at all. But enough with this whole defining malarky! I’m bored already. I enjoy reading it/I don’t enjoy reading it. Shouldn’t that be enough?

Apparently ITV is unwatchable. Well I could have told them that! I genuinely cannot remember the last time I voluntarily switched over to ITV to watch some of it’s “original” programming. Occasionally they might have a film on I want to see (very occasionally) but that is it. Not that I watch much TV anyways, but what I do tend to watch is Channel 4 (and it’s digital compadres) and the BBC channels. And Five for House and Grey’s Anatomy. Never ITV.

What is, and isn’t, news? If I knew that I’m sure I’d be the head of the BBC or something. It did surprise me that people were complaining about too much cricket being mentioned on the news. You can bet your bottom dollar the same person wasn’t complaining about football being in the news CONSTANTLY. I don’t like football, I don’t care for news about it, but I am grown up enough to realise there are people out there who do like football, and do want news about it. So, anonymous emailing person, grow up. If you don’t like something, change the channel! Then again, you’ve already been mocked on the BBC blog, so there’s really nothing I can add 😀

For some reason the David Pogue’s blog on the NYT isn’t displaying in Safari today. If anyone else experiences this, let me know. It would be nice to know that it’s not just me. Either way, I fired up Camino to find out what the story was about and had a good giggle as I re-read it. What happens when the tech in your car decides to take a holiday…

Tetris Fridge Magnets. It’s my birthday soon – anyone want to treat me?

A while back I wrote a post on why people need ‘About’ pages. (The link is in the sidebar somewhere). Turns out, it’s not just me who thinks about pages are worth the time.

I’m surprised there hasn’t been more broo-ha-ha about this. Perhaps I’m just looking in the wrong places? Either way, Stargate SG1 is finished. Sad news. Even though I don’t watch the show any more – I stopped somewhere around season four/five I think when C4 started messing with the schedule and I moved into a house where an evil house-mate refused to let his TV be ‘corrupted’. I have watched the odd episode since then, but am thoroughly confused – one minute Daniel is alive, the next dead, the next a supreme being, then alive again, then dead, then alive… ARG! Back to the point of what I was trying to say. This fine show is ended. This makes me all 🙁 At the same time, perhaps the DVDs (when all released) will become cheaper. This makes me all 🙂 Every cloud…

Calling all parents out there – ever wondered how to get undying love from your children? Wonder no more.

Tea is apparently a healthier drink than water. Woot and all kinds of joy! I’d always though excessive amounts of tea weren’t good for you – they certainly put a load on your kidneys – but it turns out I was wrong. Tea is good. Yes, the Tea Council did fund the scientist’s work, but he stresses the work is independent and unbiased…

Poor Pluto, no longer a planet. For some reason when I learnt the Solar System in school, I could always remember Pluto. It was Neptune that caused me trouble. Does this mean that kids are going to go back to school in September and have to go through their science text-books with a red marker pen and cross out all reference to Pluto? What about astrologers? No longer will they be able to say shit like “Pluto is in the house of Mercury…” because I am sure a “dwarf planet” has less astrological significance than a real planet.

My favourite people are to dig in the grounds of Buckingham Palace and other royal residences. Nooooooo! I know madness runs in the family, but really, letting Time Team loose on your property is sheer insanity! They wouldn’t know good archaeology if it leapt up and bit them in the bum. Oh god… Well, perhaps they’ll do such a crap job (quite likely) that they’ll all get accused of treason and the program will be pulled off the air. Archaeology will once more be safe.

(In case you haven’t guessed, I’m not a Time Team fan. I have a lovingly crafted rant here if you are interested).

The UN has agreed the text of the UN Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities. Bit of a mouthful, but potentially a very important mouthful. Hell knows how it’s going to implemented, but read more here.

You know a country is getting dangerous when the archaeologists leave.

Traditionally I like to end with a funny. I don’t have a funny-ha-ha this week, but I do have a funny-you-what-now? A prison inmate sues because he fell off his bunk bed. What kind of doofus falls of a bunk bed?! I slept on a cabin bed (a bunk bed with draws underneath instead of another bed) from the age of five to thirteen. I never once fell off. I’ve never once fallen off a standard bed for that matter. What was this inmate DOING to fall out of bed?

Moose emailed me this yesterday and I was skeptical, till I heard odder than usual sounds issuing from her side of the flat, inquired, and discovered she was trying to tell the difference between coo moos.

Yes, you heard me. Cow sounds.

So of course, I had to check the story out for myself – Cows have regional accents.

Apparently the look of horror on my face when I realised I’d worked on one of these farms (I’m not saying which one, it’s just too embarrassing) was something else.

So yes, there you have it. If you look down the bottom of the article you will get the chance to listen to four different regional variations of moo (I cannot believe I just typed that sentence). I have to say, they are markedly different. And, perhaps not surprisingly, the Somerset cow sounds ‘right’ to me. The other’s just aren’t as cow-like, whilst the Essex cow just sounds… plain weird.

And it’s only because I didn’t get to my digital camera fast enough that the picture gracing this post is of a cow and not of Moose doing a cow impression. If you ever get the chance, do ask her to do her cow impression. It’s uncanny. Make sure you get her to do the eyes…

😆

Sorry this is unusually late. I was at a family gathering this weekend and got back to Meadow Towers later than planned. So yes. A shorter one than normal because of tiredness and there being a dearth of interesting things out there this week. These are the few shining lights 🙂

In a staggering vote of support for common sense, the Americans have finally twigged that increased use of tanning beds increases skin cancers. Really, it’s not rocket science. UV rays can trigger skin cancers – this we are all agreed on. Sun beds pump phenomenal quantities of this radiation into your skin at a short distance for a prolonged period of time. In this case, two plus two really DOES equal four. I reckon if someone did a study of the incidence of skin cancer in this country, a huge anomaly would appear in Liverpool, the city where every other shop really is a tanning salon and it costs as little as 10 pence for five minutes! People – stop using sun beds. It’s that easy! You won’t end up with leathery skin when you get older and you might even live to be older!

In what I do hope doesn’t become a weekly series of how most Americans are really rather dumb, I bring you the news that more Americans know who Harry Potter is than Tony Blair. Yup.

Ben over at Open Switch is getting into the flow of his ‘Ask a Minister’ podcasts. This one – are Christians going to Hell? – got me thinking. My own religious journey is a long and tangled one that still isn’t over yet (the map got thrown out the window years back and who knows where I’m gonna end up) and isn’t something I talk about really, faith being an intensely personal thing as far as I am concerned. But just because I don’t talk about it doesn’t mean I don’t think about it. I recommend you have a listen to what Ben has to say – one thing though Ben if you read this – stop saying you aren’t a professional. You’re a minister aren’t you? What more qualifications do you need? You clearly have your head screwed on straight. Take pride in your views and understanding. To butcher a good quote, I might not agree with everything you say, but I like the way you say it 🙂

As I was going through the sites I’d bookmarked for the ‘Roast this week, thinking of how I was going to introduce everything, I came across Liz’s latest and started to giggle – I spent a good deal of time on Saturday night trying to drunkenly explain to relatives why I wanted to work in publishing and make words my living. So when Liz says writing communicates across the world, through time, to people I have never met. It captures ideas, inventions, and information she pretty much hits the nail on the head. Should have taken her to the party, she could have explained for me!

Having grown up in a tourist town myself, the following is freakishly familiar to me. I have fond memories of the time I misdirected a tourist because he was being unusually dumb. I could have sent him up the Tor the nice ‘easy’ route that is designed for the tourists. Even has benches on the way up. No, I sent him up the evil steep way that no one but the sheep normally use. Mwhahahahaahaaaa. So yes, I know exactly what Caryn is talking about!

Imaginary. Mystic. Dwarves. What more could you possibly want?

Junk mail is 37 percent more likely to be opened if it’s sent to a dead person. Only Moose could find a story like this.

I could have done with this last year – a list of people doing research on social network sites.

In a letter of support to the Air-Jaldi Wireless Summit, His Holiness the Dalai Lama says this about the Internet: “the Internet’s contribution to the diffusion and dissemination of knowledge and information is truly remarkable. By itself the Internet cannot feed the poor, defend the oppressed or protect those subject to natural disasters, but by keeping us informed it can allow those of us who have the opportunity to give whatever help we can”.

And to finish off, something insightful from Mike on content versus popularity and all that jazz. Yes, I should come up with a better introduction, but it’s late and I am fresh out of inspiration. Suffice it to say I read this article at work of Friday and it made me think. As ‘what made me think’ is the guiding principle behind the ‘Roast, in it goes.

Enjoy 🙂

I apologise if the tone of this week’s Roast is a little grumpier than usual in places. I just got back from grocery shopping where I got rained on for the fourth week in a row. Now, of course, it is glorious and sunny again. Grrrr. I’m off to make cheesecake in the hope that it will cheer me up. Enjoy these snippets 🙂

If, like me, you love reading you will probably have realised that new books are vastly over priced (especially, I noticed, in Canada – $20 or $30 for a paperback? Criminal!). So I bring you BookMooch, the free book trade and exchange community. It seems like a good idea. Register, list the books you have and the books you want, give and receive. It’s that easy. If I didn’t have a pathological hatred of getting rid of books once I own them (I willingly buy second hand books but am incapable of getting rid of any) I’d be using it.

I am not unaware of the pointing you towards an article about why people don’t comment and not commenting on the article myself… Liz has 10 reasons readers don’t leave comments (and I’d suggest taking the time to read the comment thread for the post as well). Now my main reasons for not commenting are 1) I am self-conscious about new groups and fitting in (I am working on it), and… pretty much everything on Liz’s list. What are your reasons, oh lurkers mine?

I do so love it when people can laugh at themselves – how many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

I’ve always loved the London skyline, especially the way that the London Eye just fits. Yes, the Manhattan skyline is perhaps more iconic and imposing, but London seems more real to me, with the juxtaposition of old and new, the mundane and breathtaking. Have a look at these pictures to get an idea of what I mean.

So what made me think about the London skyline? These two articles.

I’ve always been interested in what makes ‘good’ writing, but it is something I am becoming more and more aware of the more I try and put my thoughts into words. A List Apart has this wonderful piece on how to write to keep your readers. Like Amber I love writing for the web as it can be so personal. I also agree you should write for a single reader rather than an audience. Well, I try.

I don’t care if it is true or not, it is just funny.

Calling something the world’s most photorealistic art is a big claim, but just this once I might be true. Some of these images are frelling awesome!

Clearly this is a ‘writing’ week. Can you tell the difference between content and copy?

Do you remember when the Web was young? The Internet, 1996 style.

Oliver Stone’s film ‘World Trade Centre’ was screened this week in NYC and the New York Times has a brief piece on differing reactions to the film. I’m firmly in the ‘I have no desire to see this film, ever’. My brother should have been there, but a friend went instead. Just my own memories of that day are bad enough – I don’t need a movie to tell me the history.

Then again, perhaps the American’s do need movies to help them remember, because almost a third of them can’t remember what year 9/11 was. 2001 you dumb f**ks.

Remember me saying the other week how pretty anime was? Well now you can have it on your desktop.

Ever pondered using your ‘power’ as a blogger to take revenge? I know I’ve had a few digs at services in my time (British Gas, grrrr…. *fume*) But perhaps you have more power than you think. The moral here? Think before you eviscerate.

I feel exactly the same way.

And to finish on a lighter-hearted note, something else I don’t care if it is true or not – messages left by the royals…