That Wednesday Feeling

Insomnia 2 I don’t know if you will know this feeling, but it struck me tonight. The “getting home at the end of after another blah day at work and realise you are committed to writing a blog post but lack any inspiration or inclination” feeling.

I’ve got that.

So I am sitting at my keyboard, flicking through the bits’n’bobs folder of draft posts, happy with none of them, and I have two options as I see them.

1) Screw it. I posted some fiction last night. That can count as my mid-week post.
or
2) Throw something up that is rushed and not ready because I am obliged to post today as I said I would post each Wednesday and it’s barely been a month of this new resolution and I can’t give up so soon.

Neither appeals to me. I could have set yesterdays fiction to be posted today, but somehow my occasional fiction posts are outside of the normal blog framework for me. This blog is personal (or commentary depending on how you look at it) and, whilst my fiction is intensely personal, it is NOT blogging. The stories are an extra.

Gar. So what am I going to talk about this Wednesday?

The new 9rules? Nah. Exciting though this topic is, there’s nothing I can say that hasn’t already been said much, much better elsewhere. Though huge, massive congratulations to the lovely Esther for gaing her leaf whilst we’re on the topic. Clearly I have the best people commenting on Bright Meadow 😉

Anything else?

Well, there’s always the post I wrote in the midst of a lovely bout of insomnia on Sunday night/Monday morning, but when writing something has you in tears it is probably a good sign that it is a bit too personal to be blogged straight away. The insuing mental upheaval did have me starting to sketch again, which is a change. I have always doodled but I tend to get exasperated that my ability with the pen isn’t enough to translate what I see so clearly in my mind – I guess that is what I write; people’s own imaginations can fill in the blanks I lack the skill to describe – and that exasperation leads me to stop drawing. I like to be good at everything I do, and if I can’t do something well, I just don’t do it even if I enjoy it. So I rarely sketch, but something about Sunday night/Monday morning had me doodling away whilst I thought through some stuff.

But none of it was blog-worthy stuff, so that still leaves me with a Wednesday post and nothing to talk about.

Um. I finally caved and brought a new mattress? No. That’s really not worth blogging about. Talk about scraping the barrel!

I think we shall have to face it. This Wednesday, there really is no point in visiting Bright Meadow. I look back and realise I have taken over 600 words to say I can’t think of anything to say, but that is not new. C’est la vie.

Go, play with better content than mine while I go try and find my inspiration and writing ability. I think they might be stuck down the back of the sofa along with my mojo. Either that or I broke them dancing on Saturday night 😕

8 thoughts on “That Wednesday Feeling

  1. Aw thanks, Cas! 🙂

    I know what you mean about that impending doom of knowing you have to, I mean WANT to put out a blog post within the window of the next couple of hours. Priorities, priorities…or are they? Yes, I believe they are. 😉

  2. Or you can look back at the 600 words and realize “My God, I did have something to say after all.”

    Sometimes what we think is a lack of mojo is a way of trying to say something without realizing. Doesn’t matter that it feels bleh when we look back at it. Matters that there was always something to be said. Now that’s personal. 🙂

  3. I don’t think good writing can be set to a schedule. I have to be ready to write before I can, otherwise I just have nothing to say.

  4. 2 Things:
    1) thanks for my mention in your previous post, was great to finally meet you in person. As it turns out, you’re both pretty and intelligent. Unusual for a geek.

    2) The writing you post is a personal output with a direct correlation to the amount of stimulation you’ve received since you last wrote, within the parameters of personal sensitivity and current energy levels at the time of writing.

    If I had the means I would write it as a mathematical equation. I wish I’d paid more attention when studying fuzzy logic. Maybe it could be better expressed as VB code?

    Erm… either way, we can always write. Sometimes we doubt whether it deserves to be posted when measured against some imaginary benchmark. We like your posts, post what you like and people will comment, if only to ask if there’s anything they can do to help unblock you.

  5. Moose, I’ll agree that a set schedule isn’t always the best, but at the same time if I don’t have deadlines I don’t do anything. It’s not something to be proud of, but I do need a boot up the arse to get me going and if a self-imposed “must post on Wednesday” is what it takes, then so be it. I’m not sure I will keep the structure for ever, but right now I need that extra oomph to keep me going.

    fulnic – Aw, thank you *blush* But don’t forget I’m awe-inspiring as well 😉

  6. Lets not forget that you *were* awe-inspiring. It’s difficult to be in awe of someone you can imagine bopping to “Bed of Roses” 😀

  7. It wasn’t bed of roses fulnic, it was Living on a Prayer, which is an awesome tune, especially after a lot of vodka!!

    And Cas doesn’t bop. She wriggles, and is slinky. So ner.

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