Single White Female seeks…

It is a sure sign that a girl has reached the end of her tether when she signs up for a dating site. Yes, this is me admitting that I have signed up for a dating site. Looking at it one way, the internet has played a significant role in most aspects of my life so far, why not this one as well?

And yes, to reassure everyone, I will be careful.

Now, the tricky bit.

The photo, oh dear and fluffy lord, the photo! Now, my photostream to the contrary, I actually hate having my picture taken and rarely feel that photo captures me. My favourite picture is still the tea one which graces this blog and is my avatar all round the web. I like it for several reasons, not least because 1) it shows me drinking tea, which is kind of my default position and 2) the mug hides my face (also something of a default – if I can hide behind a scarf or something, I will!) But is it really a good shot to have on a dating site?

And then there is the blurb profile. You’d think I would be good at writing a brief bit about me, selling myself, captivating people. I am not. I stink at it, not least because I have never been concise in my life! My style is rambling, intimate, relying on twists of language to snag attention and promote humour.

You’ve got to describe yourself and your perfect match in 200 to 4000 words, and give yourself a “headline” of no more than 140 words. Reading their guidance isn’t much help. It just confuses me and makes it even harder to start!

  • DO make it work with your username and photo
  • DO make those first few words count
  • DO show your personality—not tell
  • DO grab attention
  • DO say who you’re looking for
  • DO invite a response
  • DON’T use clichés
  • Start off with a bang
  • Be specific
  • What makes you tick?
  • Give people a reason to email you
  • Keep your eye on the target
  • Tease a little

*ARG!*

*Hides under the covers with her cup of tea*

Because on top of actually having to write the damned thing, there’s then the pressure of waiting for it to work its magic. What if no one likes me? What if no one wants to date me?

*sob*

Then I realised, I have been writing Bright Meadow for years now, and you lot have always been with me, reading and commenting as the mood takes you. I have got to know some of you really well, whilst others I just get an inkling of your presence from stray comments and reader-stats. I love you all. There has to be something about my words and personality that keeps you coming back, so who better to help me write this profile?

I am being stone-cold serious about this: write me a profile. Make it funny. Make it serious. I don’t care. Add them to this post in comments, or, if you’re feeling shy, email them to cas.brightmeadow[@]gmail.com

The best one will get some small token of my estimation (I’m thinking along the lines of iTunes vouchers, or a Flickr pro account or something comparable) and, who knows, will be guest of honour at my not-wedding to the White Knight your profile enchanted 😉

I am intrigued as to what y’all come up with. How much of me has come across in this blog over the years…

17 thoughts on “Single White Female seeks…

  1. My caption was always ‘Archaeologist seeks someone far from fossilised’…not advisible. In fact humour didn’t seem to go down well at all…

    Why not introduce yourself as you do on your blog?

  2. *wrinkles nose*

    I did think about it, but my about page is a bit dull to be fair. It talks about the blog, not really about me.

    At the moment the best someone has come up with is “bubbly, kind, big breasts”. *rolls eyes* True, but I was looking for something a teensy bit less blatant!

  3. You have kind breasts?! Well, it will attract attention, but probably not the sort you are after! Just writing a profile for you as I type…;-)

  4. Cas,

    Is it not worth taking things just that *little* bit too far, just to see what reactions you get?

    Level 5 Elf Priestess seeks Level 6 or above Warlock to defrost my heart.

    Likes: Tea, blogging, sunshine
    Dislikes: Dungeons and Dragons

  5. LOL!!!!!!

    Oh that made my morning, thank you Seopher!

    Welcome to Bright Meadow and the comments – you’ve made a great start 😀

  6. Here’s a thought for your starting line… admittedly, it was composed under the influence of cough syrup, but I’ll let you be the judge of its worth:

    “Tea-loving, book-devouring, penguin-bewaring twenty-something is pursuing her publishing dreams as a new resident of Oxford.”

    You might mine some of your earlier meme entries for additional inspiration.

    And speaking as someone who’s tried online dating sites, don’t worry, there will always be men who like you; the trick will be whether any of the men *you* find interesting like you in return. But definitely try it and see what happens! You’ve had great luck this year, so maybe it will carry over to the dating scene.

  7. I’m going with the genius idea we had at the weekend.

    “Rogue looking for her Gambit. OK, so I can live without the accent from the bayou, but I’m looking for a geeky boy that can keep up with a geeky girl and won’t be intimidated by my book collection!”

  8. Cheryl – cough syrup is FUN! (I was horrendously allergic to it as a kid. It made me go completely psycho and off the walls by all accounts. Think Satan on a sugar and caffiene high according to my mum!)

    Neko – I do like the idea.

    “Rogue seeks Gambit.
    So the accent from the bayou isn’t a deal breaker, and thinking about it, I could probably live without the power to make things randomly explode, but I am looking for a geeky boy who can keep up with a quirky girl on her adventures. Ability to see the funny side of life and to argue passionately about books a must”.

  9. 1) Any time hon. My going rate is tea, lots and lots of tea.
    2) Very well! Still a little tender, but the razor burn has finally faded! And now it is healing, the white is coming through a lot more and it looks really lovely and dainty. I adore it!

  10. Maybe it just speaks volumes about my character, but I still think that there’s more fun to be had in trying to derive humour from the whole ‘online dating experience’ than from socialising with some of the men you find on there.

    From what I’ve seen (of female friends attempting such things) it largely comes down to a few categories:

    a) older men looking to rekindle their youth, doing so by sending you pictures of their genitals and trying to be non-chalant about the whole experience

    b) creepy men who still appear to be living in their parents basements who refer to breasts as “warlocks”

    c) normal men. busy professionals who just don’t meet that many women and therefore use online dating to widen their chances. harmless and just like everyone else.

    The caveat of course is that a) and b) are the most likely to approach you because c) has a job and isn’t trawling for sex at 3am on a Saturday morning.

    Remember Cas, cynicism is key!

  11. Seopher, trust me, I am deriving much humour from the whole experience (as are my friends!) and it has also been an AWESOME ego boost!

    Rest assured, I am avoiding type A and B like the plague. As for the type C, I am just having a laugh seeing what is out there with no expectations.

    Well, not many 😉

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